Smiling. Laughing. Denying. Hiding the pain. It’s so easy to think you know someone by just meeting them every once in a while. It’s so easy to judge what you can never figure out unless you were in my shoes. The pain I once thought would go away when I’m an adult is still here. Some weeks I can hear it knocking on my door, loud and clear, but most weeks I’m able to suppress it. So no one will hear. See. Or can tell. Aren’t we all just wearing masks in life?
Breathe in deeper. Forget. Start over. Meditate. Overcome the darkness hanging over me like a cloud. Why can’t this dark cloud go away? Always one step forward and two steps back. Smile. Laugh. No one will ever tell. The shadows that haunt me.
Falling into a deep well. So dark in here. Is there any point of coming up to the surface? Will you all be there? Why? No one to trust. They’ll all fade away. Won’t come back. Is this enough? The sighs outweigh the will. Carry on. The will to carry on.